Mismade Maids

Four Mis-made maids

The magic show had been alright, but nothing to write home about until the last illusion. The magician, who called himself 'The Amazing Franklin' had amused, but not astounded particularly. Perhaps I was viewing with a jaded attitude, having seen the greats both on TV and live, but billiard ball and card routines do not excite the hardened illusion fan, despite being well performed. Up until the final illusion, I would award 10 out of 10 for technical performance, about 5 out of 10 for originality and style, but nothing for making me wish I could get a video of the show. Even his two female assistants disappointed, being only moderately pretty and being more part of the scenery than the magic; their main task was to hand stuff to Franklin.

By the time of the last illusion, I was checking my watch and my girlfriend, Judy, was getting restive. She mentioned in a whisper that the magician had approached her during the interval and asked if she would be willing to assist in his final illusion. She had said 'yes'.

The curtains closed behind Franklin and he addressed the audience.

"For my next and final piece of magic," he announced, "I have selected four young ladies from the audience. They know who they are. Would you please put your hands together for my volunteers, while they come up on stage."

Three woman and my girlfriend stood up and with as little fuss as could be managed made their way on the stage.

Once they were up there, Franklin talked to each of them, obviously trying to put them at there ease.

The first girl was called Abby. She was a blonde with an ample bosom who said she worked in a typing pool. The second called herself Clare. She was a brunette with the shapeliest legs of the four. She said she looked after her kids, while her husband ran a store. The third was my Judy, who is a fitness instructor. Franklin complimented her on her curly red hair and her slim but powerful build. Finally, there was Fiona, the mayor's wife, her black tresses did not cover up the fact that she is a little overweight. I noticed all the woman were the same height.

"As you can see these ladies have never met me before tonight and have all come with friends or family. They did not know before the interval that I would ask them to participate in the show. In fact none of them are properly dressed for the magic I plan to perform, so I am going to ask them to change into some clothes that I will provide."

The assistant named Jenny came on and led the woman off. On the way past Franklin asked them if there was anyone in the audience they would trust to help him and honestly describe what they are seeing close-up to the rest of the audience. Judy mentioned me and when they were gone, I was called up to the stage and introduced to the audience as their eyes and ears on stage. He even went so far as to clip a radio microphone to my tie.

The conversation we had while we waited for the women to return was trivial, but when they girls did come back I felt quite at home on the stage.

The woman were now dressed each in a short blouse that exposed some mid-riff, a just short of knee-length skirt and boots that reached mid-shin. Abby's were white, Clare's had tiger stripes, Judy's were scarlet and Fiona's were black. It was evident to all that the girls' outfits were color co-ordinated with their hair.

There was some more chat the point of which was to tell the audience that the girl's had not been briefed in their short time out of view and introduce me to the girls.

The curtain went back up. The stage was bare, except for four empty rectangular tables. Almost immediately Franklin's assistants each dragged on two columns of four white painted cubes, which were soon in position. We were all asked to inspect these cabinets. Each cube was three sides that were solid, the fourth side being a door with another door in it. The tops and bottoms of each cube were open. Each stack of four had a square metal plate in the bottom and top cubes to make a top and bottom of a cabinet. The bottom cube of each stack rested in a shallow tray on small wheels. It was quickly obvious to me that there were no trap doors or other hiding places in the cabinets and I said so.

All the girls were looking nervous and this nervousness increased when Franklin told them to select a cabinet each and get into it. As the girls entered the cabinets with trepidation, the two assistants came back with sets of shackles. Jenny handed me a set of shackles. The other assistant, Susan, handed a set to Franklin. Jenny led me to Judy's cabinet and instructed me to chain her into the cabinet. First, I used the handcuffs to hold Judy's arms together below her breasts, then I knelt to shackle her ankles, the chain between her ankles was long enough to reach a hook at the back of the bottom cube, so I hooked the chain on. Finally, I took the last item, which was a padded collar and attached that around Judy's neck and hooked the chain on that to another hook at the back of the top cube. Almost unconsciously I was giving the audience and Judy a commentary on what I was doing and trying to reassure Judy that I would let nothing untoward happen to her. When I was finished, Franklin asked me to check the other women. They were attached to their respective cabinets in exactly the same way as Judy.

"Close the doors and open the inner doors!" ordered the Amazing Franklin. We all did this for our respective cabinets and soon the volunteers were shut in the cabinets but still visible. Jenny and Susan quickly went into the wings, while I checked that Abby, Clare, Judy and Fiona were alright, which they were except for some nerves. Judy was clearly the most nervous, because she had some idea what to expect. Franklin's assistants came back with a trolley each laden with blades.

Franklin instructed me to close the bottom two doors on Judy's and Fiona's cabinets and he did the same for Abby and Clare. I closed the bottom doors on Judy's cabinet and turned to closed the same doors on Fiona's, when Judy let out a squeal. As I shut Fiona's lower doors, I turned to see what had caused Judy to squeal. I saw Jenny finishing inserting a pair of metal blades between the lower two sections of Judy's cabinet. Before I could prevent the completion of this apparently harmful act, Jenny ducked away. I approached Judy's cabinet and asked if she was alright. She told me that it had stung in the front of both legs, but other than that she felt perfectly fine. I looked into the cabinet through the still open door to the torso section. I could not see the bottom of the cabinet because the metal blade that had just been inserted was in the way, but I could not see what had been done to Judy's legs because the skirt was in the way.

While I was describing what seemed to have happened to Judy, Franklin and Susan had closed the torso section doors on Abby's and Clare's boxes and inserted sets of blade through slots that aligned with their waists. To disturbed by what appeared to be happening I wandered over to Abby's box to try and figure out what was going on. Franklin rushed round me and began to peform the same deadly process to Judy and Fiona. I heard Judy squeal again. This time I recognised where I had heard Judy squeal like that previously. Occasionally, when we were alone, Judy and I would horse about, this way I discovered that she was extremely ticklish and if you tickled her suddenly just below the ribs (and some other places) instead of laughing she squealed. This remembrance and the fact that none of the others seemed making any cries of anguish, relaxed me quite a bit. I relaxed to the point I remembered that this was a magic show and all this was some sort of trick no matter how real it seemed.

My intellect got a chance to do a double take at the situation. I could still see the faces of the victims, who I reminded myself were selected from the audience. At least one of the victims was personally known to me, and I was as sure as anyone can be that she had not be trained in any of this. Judy could not keep this kind of thing secret, if she had been trained, because she makes it absolutely obvious she has a secret and a few subtly placed tickles will get anything from her (they are more effective than the proverbial wild horses, by far). I also recognised the mayor's wife from the local newspaper, so it seemed unlikely she was a stooge.

During my introspection Franklin and his assistants had closed the doors on the top sections of each cabinet and inserted a pair of blades at neck level in each white column.

Franklin instructed me to go to each column and see if I got any response. At the first column, Clare's, I tapped on the top cube and received back a couple of faint taps from the cube below. At Abby's cabinet I called, "Are you all right?" and got the reply, "I think so." The same call at Fiona's column got the response, "let me out of here!" When I went finally to Judy's box and tapped. The response was, when edited for taste, "how could you let this happen to me.

By the time I had done my tour of each of the columns, Franklin, assisted by Susan and Jenny, had unstacked the component cubes of Abby and Clare's cabinets and distributed them about the four tables and were begining on Fiona's. Each section was removed from the column and placed on one of the tables. Susan took the bottom one and with a practised flick of her foot propelled the shallow tray that had supported the cabinet into the wings. Then it came the moment to dismantle Judy's container. Franklin lifted the top cube from the stack and handed it me. His assistants unstacked the rest which joined the other cubes on the tables. Then in a highly complicated piece of cheorography they began switching the boxes between the tables. I was already confused as to which boxes contained which pieces of which hapless volunteer, but afterwards I was sure that all the audience were equally clueless as the whereabouts of each woman's parts. It would have taken someone which fiendish concentration and twenty eyes to have kept track of the toing-and-froing of plain white cubes. Then I realised that I did know what was in one of the boxes. Judy's head was supposed to be in the box I was holding.

The dance finished and between them Jenny and Susan carried one of the tables forward. On the table there were three of the plain white cubes. I was invited to arrange these boxes in a line on the table and add the one I was holding. I did very little re-ordering of the three boxes on the table and added the box I had been given to the end of the row.

Franklin stood behind the table and flipped open the doors on the fronts of the boxes. I nearly tripped as I stepped back at the sight of the four heads blinking from the boxes in the sudden light, each held in a padded collar.

The audience roared their approval.

The boxes were soon being rearranged again and a box selected from each table to make a column. Franklin invited me to open the inner doors. The box at the top contained the confused and slightly dizzy blonde head of Abby. The one below that contained an upper torso in the brown blouse that Clare had been wearing. I figured that the next box would contain either Fiona's or Judy's lower torso and thighs; I was wrong, it contained Judy's upper torso, but upside-down, and the final, bottom box contained Fiona's inverted head.

"There we have a queen of hearts for reak," announced Franklin. As the applause died, Fiona started complaining about feeling funny from being on her head. This was the cue for the assistants and the magician to reclose doors and shuffle the parts of the four women still further.

Franklin came up to me and asked, "Are you psychic, by any chance?"

"Not so as you'd notice," I answered, because I had wondered if I was; I frequently take different routes to work, only to hear later that my usual route had problems, which it never has when I use it.

"Well, the thing is we've lost track of which lady is in which box, but we do know which sections are which so all the feet are on that table, the hips are on that one, the shoulders are over there and the heads over there. So would you mind reconstructing the volunteers?"

For a moment I wondered why he thought I stood any chance of making a better job of the situation than he could, then it occurred to me that he propably know exactly what part of who was where and he would stir me, either directly or by subliminal cues to do precisely what he wanted. So, I said, "I'll give it a go."

First they brought forward the foot boxes which I allowed them to arrange in a row. Acting the part I went to each one and placed my hand on the upper blade and pausing as if I might be detecting the contents of the box.

The hip boxes came to me and were held for me to place my hand on, before I directed it to be placed on a particular foot box. This was repeated with the torso boxes and finally the head boxes. I later worked out that the chances of getting all the ladies stacked right were 1 in just short of 14,000.

"Now it's time to see how well you did in arranged the right parts to the right lady."

I assumed that they would start opening inner doors to reveal what kind of mess I had made of assigning the right parts to the right volunteers. I was wrong again; there was an almighty clatter of blades being pulled from cabinets and slung towards the back of the stage. And before I had gathered my wits all the blades were scattered behind the cabinets.

Slightly stupified, I was guided by Jenny to stand by the third cabinet and followed suit when they opened the top doors of the cabinets. I was relieved to see Judy's face; she seemed relieved to see me too, but not particularly happy.

They opened the next door down and I copied them. Inside that section was not the red blouse covering Judy's pert breasts, but the white one straining to contain Abby's chest. I did not have much time to wonder at this because I was copying the opening of the third door; again not a red skirt, but the black one stretched over Fiona's large bottom andd thigh. This barely had time to register before I was exposing a legs, also not Judy's in tiger stripe boots.

The magician, his assistants and I held out our hands and guided the volunteers from the cabinets to forward of the curtain line; akkowing the curtain to swing into place.

The whole place erupted in applause, hooting, cheers, every kind of noise; so much so that nobody heard Judy ask, "My body feels odd, what happened?" or me reply "Things have got a bit mixed up, you've got several other peoples' bodies."

Instead of screaming and trying to batter me, which I guess would have been my reaction in the same situation, she checked herself out and commented. "Great tits, but I wouldn't want them long-term; I get terrible back ache. This a super booty, pity about the thighs. And the legs and feet superb too."

By this time the other volunteers had discovered that their head were supported on bodies that were not in any part their own and Fiona was complaining loudly to Franklin that she wanted her body back. Clare and Abby seemed dazed by the situation.

The magician held out his hands to calm the audience and stated, "The ladies don't seemed to be comfortable with the changes that have occurred, so I had better put them back in the right order.

Fiona was the first to protest that she was not going back in the cabinets to be chopped up again. The other quickly agreed that being mismade a second time was not an option. fortunately Franklin said he had another plan and, on cue, Susan and Jenny wheeled on a larger cabinet, which had no slots in it to take any blades.

Franklin open the door in the front and ushered the mixed up women into it. There was nearly not enough space for all four, until Franklin told them to make a circle and hug each other; or in some instances themselves under a different head. He closed and latched the door.

He took hold of a pair of handles on his side of the cabinet and indicated I should take hold of the other end. Between us we lifted from a pair of hooks on the back a square item almost as big as the floor area of the box which contained Judy and her fellow victims. He guided me round the back od the box so that the audience could see what we were holding; it was a square of crisscrossed blades, like you might find in a chip cutter, except the square holes between the blades were about four inches in each direction.

Once the audience realised what they were looking at the was an general 'ooo' from them. Franklin lead us to the front of the cabinet, set the blades horizontal and then raised them over the cabinet, which I noticed had an open top. Still guided by the magician, we lowered the chip cutting device down brush sided slots in the side walls. As we lower the blades, which were too large in the box to avoid and had holes to small to squeeze through, I again wondered what I was doing lowering sharp blades onto my girlfriend.

I could not decide if it was a good or bad thing that we heard nothing from inside. We soon had the blades down to the base of the box. Franklin unlatched and opened door and as the volunteers emerged from the box in their original bodies and clothes, I took hold of Judy and hugged her.

I was so relieved to have her back in the one piece that I adore, that I said, "Judy, I love you; willy ou marry me?"

The audience went wild, but soon a hush descended, because they wanted to hear Judy's answer.

Judy kissed me full on the lips and then lowered her head to speak into the microphone clipped to my tie. "Yes, I'll marry you." Even I did not hear what she said after that, because the crowd raised the roof with cheering whistling and hollering, such was the joy in that room.